Patients: 5. Pee Breaks: 0.

Patients: 5. Pee breaks: 0. Lunch: charted, not eaten.

You held it for 9 hours. You hold it again for hours 10 through 12. You go to the bathroom at 1907 and immediately get paged. The UTI is in your future. The UTI is in your present. The kidney pain is just adrenaline, you decided. The bladder, the kidneys, the entire urinary tract are, in fact, filing a grievance. The tee is for after — when you have, finally, peed.

What you're getting

• Material. Soft-hand cotton/poly blend. Holds shape after wash 47, the 0700 vomit splash, and a year of being used as backup pajamas.
• Fit. Unisex true-to-size. Size up if you want post-shift-nap fit. Size down if you want "I went to the gym between shifts" energy that's a complete lie.
• Print. DTG, soft on skin. The joke holds up wash after wash, even after that one time you slept in it without showering after a 16-hour ICU run.
• Care. Cold wash. Tumble dry low. Built for nurses, washed like a nurse — frequently, with intent, and occasionally with hospital-grade detergent.

Send it to

For every Med-Surg lifer. For every nurse who has charted lunch she did not eat. For yourself, every 12-hour shift, on schedule.

Pairs with

Pairs with the matching sweatshirt for the day the AC at the nurses' station gives up. Add the 3" sticker for $6.50 if you really want the full unit-uniform.

Throw it on. Hydrate. Break the streak. (Or don't.)

For nurses who have run a code, charted "patient resting comfortably" while the patient was, in fact, screaming, and considered — fleetingly, in a parking lot, post-shift — leaving and never coming back. Patients: 5. Pee breaks: 0. Lunch: charted, not eaten. Built by nurses, tested on night shift. Search-relevant: funny nurse t-shirt, dark humor nurse t-shirt, er nurse t-shirt, nurse week gift, NCLEX gift.